Simplicity, chaos, but so much love!

Okay, so why is it that as adults, or families, we (when I say we, I mean me!) no longer seek new friendships? We no longer really take that plunge in enlarging our friend circle and just stay in our own little bubble or comfort zone? Maybe it's just me? Maybe this is the way that everyone works? So, that's my question to you, do you look for new friendships often?
It's not that we, our family, do not have friends, we do, wonderful friends, but I wouldn't say that we are terribly close to very many...seriously, less than a handful. I am not sure if it's because we have such a large family, or maybe because our children are still fairly young, or maybe it's that our schedules are awful??? Or...it could be that we would rather have family gatherings at home then to go out without kids usually ? We have such little family time, that when we do, we want to spend it together. Don't get me wrong, we like the occasional date night (such as Friday night, thanks again sis!) but, generally speaking, we spend our time together...
Growing up, you cannot have enough friends. You are constantly looking for more people to run in your circle. When a new kids comes to school, you immediately approach them to see what they are like to see if they may be a good fit. But, as an adult, maybe we just do not do this. Do we not have time? Fear of rejection? I just don't know why?
Recently, we've become acquainted with a family that, because of our children, we have formed a new friendship. This family took the initiative and I am very happy they did. It made me realize how important it is to put yourself out there and reach out to new people. Don't get me wrong, we have some great friendships that are longtime friends who we love and adore like family, but it is also nice to meet new people and share new interests, or...sometimes old interests that you have forgotten about. So, it's just made me wonder why we don't put ourselves out there more? I would like to put an effort forth of doing this more in the future. Just sort of reaching out to people I feel may have some things in common with our family.
So, that's my tangent I guess for now. On another note, I am terribly missing my husband tonight. I know people probably think I am crazy that after 13 years together, I miss him after just a few hours of separation, but I do! Since he went to ISP, he has always had Sunday's off. This new schedule has of course changed that. So, while he had his first Friday off in years, he now will go a few weeks without having a weekend day off. This is the family time. The time I am off from work and the kids are off from school and Sunday's have always been our day...guaranteed family time.
It wasn't until after lunch that I realized he worked tonight, and then I was so disappointed! :( The kids were confused because daddy is always home on Sundays! It's sort of hard to explain to young kids that schedules change without us having a choice in the matter. Double :(.
So, Adam, the wonderful husband he is, upon leaving for work, totally unbeknownst to me, left his t-shirt that he had on today, smelling like him (his cologne really) on my pillow for me! He knows how much I love the smell of his cologne on him and so after he went to work he text me that he left me something, and I found it! So sweet (shh...don't tell him I told you!) Now, as I sit here typing after this long day of taxes, cleaning, laundry, meals, qt with family, 2 workouts, running Adam dinner and then showering, I sit here in my husband's t-shirt (that's way too big for me) smelling like him and it makes me both happy and sad simultaneously! You know how a certain smell reminds you of something, well this cologne is ADAM for me. He's worn it since I met him and so, it makes me think of him immediately, and of course, right now, I miss him.
I still continue to pray that the Lords plan works fast for us! So frustrating to be patient sometimes isn't it! It's so hard to hear Adam and the kids ask "when is it our time for change"? The kids and I were talking on our trip back home from delivering dinner to Adam at the post... just about praying for Adam and this job opportunity that has presented itself...they continue to ask if he's heard anything and I just always reply "no, but we are still praying". So, being completely used to this response Tyler asks me tonight "what if God doesn't want daddy to switch positions or shifts"! :( Sad when your 11 year old brings this to light! So I said, "well, we then pray that God helps us to better cope with his current situation because ultimately it's about His plan and he knows whats best for us", so that's how I end my night. Praying for God's direction.

Okay, so I know I have posted a lot lately about Adam and his job, but with the shooting of Officer Moore last weekend, my mind is even more filled with not only love, but worry, for my policman husband. My morning always starts out at work at grabbing the morning Indy Star paper. This week, the headlines have all been about Officer Moore, and against my better judgement, I cannot help but read everything. I say that because, reading about this terrible instance, makes me only worry that it may one day involve my husband. I know, I know, worry is not of God, but of Satan trying to weaken us. But for the life of me, I cannot stop worrying.
A friend of mine, and former officer, posted a video on Facebook this morning with a title of "Policmen" and a picture of a squad car. Intrigued, I of course played it. And, a familiar voice started narrating the story behind policemen (and women). Paul Harvey, a voice I used to listen to every Sunday morning while getting ready for church, narrated this short video that I think everyone should watch.
In the Indy Star yesterday, there was a story regarding why we are seeing so many violent acts lately against police officers. I think they said that in all of 2010, there were 62 deaths of officers on duty due to violence and so far in 2011 we are already up to 15! 15 in one month! They say they think it's because hatred towards police have grown across the US! Let me say that again...hatred towards police officers! Though, the story did not elaborate as to why that would be?! HATE, POLICE?! I just don't understand....
Don't get me wrong, I know that there are dirty cops. Cops who should have never been graced with a badge, gun and power. Cops that give the really good guys a very bad name. But, generally speaking, policemen are the GOOD GUYS! Don't get mad at them because they call you out on your problems! You know, the ones that mean you are breaking the law! Don't bad mouth them and hate them because of something YOU did! They are just doing their job! They are keeping you, and the rest of us, SAFE! 
It just irritates me so much. So many people dislike cops with a passion....that is, until they need them for something! Until the police do something wonderful for them, you know, something life changing! Until they save a life of someone they love, often risking their own life in the process! There are not many people out there who go to work on a daily basis knowing that in that workday/night, they quite possibly will be put into a situation where they will risk their life for a complete stranger! Policmen, firemen, soldiers...they all do this! They do it for all of us! And people HATE them? What is wrong with this picture!?
Well, that's my vent for the day. All I know is that I am happy that today and tomorrow, my policeman husband will be safe at home with us. He has his first Friday off in like 5 years! Cause for celebration! But, when he returns to work on Sunday, my worry will return, as will my constant prayers for my husband and all of those who serve us. Lord keep them safely in your arms and let them all return home to their families! Thank you to all the men and women who walk that "thin, blue line!"
This is the video (thanks for sharing Mike):

As I read the local headlines this morning, I can't help but feel grief for the family of the IMPD officer David Moore. I didn't know him, and do not know anyone who did, but I know that his family is mourning a great loss today. It's hard to lose someone you love, but harder when they are so young and it's such tragic circumstances. The whole town has come together for this family and even in this situation, it warms my heart to see that union.
As the wife of a police officer, stories like this always draw my attention. It gets my attention and usually worries me. I worry not for just my husband, but for all of the officers I know. You see, these officers are trained to be safe and do all that they can to come home at night, but sometimes, all the training in the world does not help because they are paired with an insane individual whose sole mission is to harm them.
I know that when it's your time, there is nothing you can do about it. That it's all in the Lords timing as to when he calls you home. Adam reminds me of this often. I truly know this in my head, but it's sometimes hard to know this in my heart.
I have to admit that I find myself often wishing that Adam had a different career. That he wasn't doing this type of work...that he was doing something much safer and less stressful. But, it is what it is. So, this day, I pray for all policemen/women, especially my policeman, and for the family of David Moore.

Okay, so by now you know that I am the wife of a state trooper, and that I worry all the time! So, here's the scoop. Adam started his new schedule yesterday and I was already worrying about him going to 9.5 hour days and getting even less sleep then he already does. I worry because he was already so very tired, each and every day from working 8.5 hour days, getting home late and then getting up early with the 2 kids that are still home and taking care of the during the day, only to go back to work the next night and do it all over again. :( I was trying to figure out a way to enable him to go in an hour earlier so he could get home at the same time he was already, but it just would not work out. There is a 30 minute gap between the time that I get off work and the time he would need to go in. And, in that 30 minute window, 2 of the kids need picked up at 2 different schools, so, as you can see, it just won't work out.

So, worrying about these issues set aside....after Tyler's basketball practice, I got home and realized that Adam had called while I was driving. He didn't leave a voicemail, so I returned his call and...oh dread, I get his voicemail. Which immediately alarms me, making me think that something is wrong. I knew he was headed out to the interstate on an accident and so, I think...oh no! You see, Adam rarely calls me. Usually he sends a text if he needs to contact me somehow, so for him to call, I think it's important. But, here's the frustrating thing, he does not leave a message to let me know what he needs!

So...I spend the next 2 and a half hours, calling him and texting him to see if he's okay. I get nowhere! So, my anxiety just continues to escalate. I was exhausted from not sleeping well Sunday night, and despite being so tired, I could not go to sleep because I was worried about Adam. So, finally he answers his phone and just from hearing his big voice saying "hello" I felt instant relief, because this meant he was okay. So...I find out that he was at the post the whole time doing paperwork and his phone was in the car and that's why he was not answering. And...the only reason he called earlier was to ask how Tyler's practice was! SO, all the worrying for nothing! I scolded him and ask that in the future, if he's going to call, please just leave a message so that I do not worry! Of course, he doesn't get why I was so worried! Ugh, men! So...todays lesson, if you are going to take the time to place a phone call to someone, and you allow voicemail to pick up...leave a message so they don't wonder why you called!

On another note. I have to give mad props to my parents. They are a wonderful support system to us. The kids are so close to them and they are always there when we need them, in some way or another. I am very fortunate, to be close to them physically and emotionally. I don't know what we would do with them! I hope that we can work it out that they can go on vacation with us, because they deserve it!

And...on to me now. I have been working out every single day for a month now. I've never been a diet person, because we eat pretty well anyway, but I have been really watching my diet as well. I have to say, I feel really good, but the scale does not reflect any changes....which I must admit...is discouraging. I have always said, I don't care what my weight is as long as I feel and look good, weight is just a number! But, now, I am rethinking this! After working so hard, I kind of want my weight to reflect this! So, I guess, I just need to work harder! Why is it that numbers are so important to us anyway: our bank account balance, our credit score, our weight? Isn't who we are more important than what we are? A life lesson I am still working on apparently.

So...it's Monday morning and as I reflect on the weekend I realize how much more fun we have when we have nothing to do! When we can actually enjoy the weekend by just hanging around the house and not running around all weekend. Sadly, this does not happen very often, but when it does, it is like gold to us, totally and completely priceless. We rarely have family time and even more rare, do we not have anything that we HAVE to do. But, thankfully, this weekend was just that way. The only commitment we had was Tyler's basketball game on Saturday morning! Yes, I said morning! For some reason, he has super late night practices, but then early games?! But, I won't complain, because atleast he is playing!


After gametime, he had his friend over for the rest of the day/night and then some other good friends came over. We had a house full of 5 adults and 9 children. It was a mad house, but we loved every minute of it. Enjoying close friends, good food (pasta, salad, bread, and brownies! Does it get any better?) and then some games! I have to say, having three 11 year old boys proved that wrestling and football is their favorite past time! I just knew we'd end up in the ER with an injury...happy to report, that my gut was wrong! The age gap in girls made the night not as fun for my girls, but they made it through, eventhough they were the first to turn in!
My workout regime improved over the weekend as I cut over a minute and a half off of my mile on the treadmill, jogging at a faster speed then I ever have! My lungs are still so tight from influenza though, can't wait for that to end.
Thinking I will add a morning workout of strength training?! We will see if I can get enough sleep for this.


Adam's new schedule starts tonight, to which we are both dreading. He will now get an hour less sleep, as will I because, most nights, I am unable to get to sleep until I know he's home safe. Oh love, gets me every time! Ugh, rotating schedule with new hours and longer days just really stinks. Yes, I know, there are a lot of people without jobs and I should not complain...we are so greatful he has a job, but we are so ready to have a more normal schedule so that we can actually see each other and maybe have some quality time together, 10 years is a long time.
Still praying we hear some good news regarding Adam's job, but know it's all up to the Lord and His plan and that may not be the same plan/desire we have. So, praying we are content with His decision for us. Adam thinks they already know who they want and his chances are slim, but praying that they change their mind. It would mean big changes for Adam and us. Positive changes! And, after 10 years, we could really use a positive change. Adam is such a good man, husband, father, trooper...and he works so hard, it would be nice for him to reap something from that hard work for a change. I love him so much and want the best for him, and just wish something positive would happen for him because he is so deserving.


On to other topics, just finishing up my finance class and sort of sad. I like the math classes so much! There's only one right answer and there are no grey areas. I love math! I know...weird! I love that it's tax time and I can sit down and run all the numbers and do our taxes! Just wish I had all the paperwork, so I could get that over with! Hopefully, by the end of the week.


Well, Happy Monday! Here's to a new week! Toasting to good friends and lazy weekends!

So. I have to admit that after hearing about the forecast for last night and today, I was completely shocked not to get a phone call in the wee morning hours saying that Greencastle had a delay or a cancellation. Then, after getting on the roads with kids in tow this morning, I was even more shocked as the roads had not yet been touched and were quite slippery. But, the more snow days we take, the longer we have to go at the end of the year which is when we are hoping to take vacation, so...I won't complain.
Only, to get a phone call at 10am saying they were letting out 2 hours early because of the snowy conditions. So, uh hum...I think my shock this morning was correctly placed in that school should have just been canceled to begin with. I feel bad for those families that both parents are at work and now must make arrangements.
I am taking the afternoon off and picking up my kids and headed home for some much needed sledding before Adam hits the roads tonight. Of course, I will worry for his safety (and that of other officers) working in these conditions. Prayers for safety for all of them.
Last night was so nice to have Adam home on a weeknight. Never does this happen. His interview went well, and now we wait....always so much fun!
Thinking about one of Adams co-workers as he and his family are dealing with so much right now. It's not my place to mention who they are or what is happening, I just ask that you lift them up in prayer as it's a terrible situation and God knows who they are.
That's it for now! Have a safe and enjoyable snow day everyone!

Wow! Who thought it would be so hard to keep up! It has been way to long since I have posted. A lot has happened. We have made it through our busy birthday/holiday season. Sadly, half of the Christmas break was spent sick. Addison started us off with strep throat on her 5th birthday (so sad). Then I had the worst migraine ever that sent me to the doctor/hospital...it lasted 2.5 days! All sorts of drugs and an apt with the neuro...think we find the source! Have to say that I have an awesome husband who took such good care of us through this all. I know he was a bit scared the day I got the migraine as he's not used to seeing me in pain like that (seriously...I would rather go through labor again with no pain meds than have a migraine like that again!) but, he handled it very well. Then, he took care of everyone and everything while I was sick with the flu. Have to say, he surprised even me sometimes. Yeah, influenza made it's way through the family! 2 weeks worth of it, somehow Adam did not get it, but he's the only one!
School for the kids is busy, Tyler is knee deep in basketball for the youth league. The girls are active in cheer and tumbling. Griffin is...well Griffin...our baby! School for me, just continual. Fairly certain after being done with ASB this summer I will continue with getting my bachelor in finance or accounting...we'll see.
Home improvements are still ongoing. I have to say with each task I feel a sense of pride and completion.
Adam's schedule changes this Sunday, and not for the better! Still wish we all had more family time together. Praying the Lord has a plan that will change this all very soon.
Not much else going on right now. Will try to keep up, eventhough I am fairly certain no one is really reading this.